The Abyss

Between work school and my project I rarely have time to relax and it doesn’t help my back has been hurting me to the point I randomly burst into tears. I had a friend of mine give me one of her famous massages, but now I feel like I got ran over by a truck a few times, and speaking of trucks mine has a flat tire. Anyway she was concerned because I had one huge knot along up next to my spine, and one deep underneath, which could be a sign of severe injury, lets hope its not. Anyway I’m not very good at juggling but I’m learning how to pretty well, but if I don’t get a break soon I’m probably going to fall flat on my face and not get back up, but I have no time to rest, I’m about to start working more and I have to get this project done as soon as possible. Well, that’s my spill for the day. Sorry that this will probably just annoy the only follower I do have.

I don’t think anyone actually reads what I’m typing, but I thought it would be nice to write some things down on my down time. Alright so as the only follower I have and other people have noticed I haven’t been drawing. I want to draw, I have things I want to draw, but the inspiration and skill I once had runs blank as soon as i look at the paper infront of me. It doesn’t help that I had gotten really burnt out of drawing when summer was over and now my senior project is making me draw. I’m just not sure how to get my inspiration back. I have also been extremely inactive online and with quite a few of my friends since I moved to a town farther away. Between exhaustion and the responsibilities I have, I’ve just been too swamped to relax and continue working on the relationships with people that I already have, even friendships. It doesn’t help that I’m getting nervous and antsy again, because I’m finally in a relationship where everything is a stand still. I mean we are really close and we spend a lot of time together when we have a chance, but most of the time we have been so exhausted that we either just watch a movie and fall asleep or just get to run errands together, but it has been getting better. We are starting to have fun together again, and I think as this improves so will my motivations. I don’t know. This year has been a lot of fun, probably one of the best years of my life, but to be honest I am completely and totally exhausted. After March though everything will calm down, because all I will have left to do is Band, Work and my project. Which I will need to start taking pictures for and I may or may not post them up here. Anyway as I said in the beginning I don’t think anyone really reads this, but I felt I needed to “spill the beans.” I think this is something I’m going to start doing more regularly. It seems to put my mind at a bit more ease, plus it works on my slowing dying typing skills. Any who Ta-Ta for now.